Kindly Unspoken
by Constance-Lirit
Summary: Oc x Pein & Kisame. Konan x Hidan - A girl that joined the Akatsuki from a young age finds life difficult, behind smiles and laugh's she feels alone. Every time her heart finds a new link, it crushes her soul a little more. M - Swearing
1. Chapter 1

Another lecture, you would have thought she would get a break from it, but no matter where she went someone would tell her off in the base. In the garden Zetsu would plight about her stepping on something, in the living room Kakuzu would complain she was making a mess. In her bedroom Hidan would storm in, complaining that she wasn't a Jashinist.  
In the hallway Itachi, or Sasori, would complain she was clogging up the room to get around, even in the massive hunk of cave out back; someone managed to find something wrong with her. This time it was Deidara, whom was complaining that she was in his way, he wanted to blow things up. Sometimes she hated being the youngest, at the ripe age of four she had joined because of her age.

Pein - the leader - had taken pity on her. The ironic thing was the fact that she had been in the organisation, from the very start. She was here way before even Kakuzu or Sasori reared a fat head in the door. Yet ever since they joined everything was pinned on her, Tobi's crumbs in the bed, Konan cutting paper up all over the floor, even Sasori's wood chippings was apparently her fault.  
Okay, maybe she was over exaggerating a bit but it was true, she couldn't do anything without getting in trouble for it. Grumbling she leaves with her tail between her legs, out into the garden to sit on a stump and stare into space; perhaps if she stayed still no one would bother her. Fat chance as Tobi comes skipping along, tripping over her foot and landing flat on his orange face.  
The crimson red hair with black streaks turning to peer down at him, watching him sit up and look at her. "Y-you tripped Tobi up! waaah!!" he screeches, running away to trip over a rock a few meters further, counting the minutes a bellowing voice tares her mind apart.

"Lokier!" grunting she clacks the metal bar in her tongue against her teeth, standing up and going towards the sound to look at a scowling ginger.  
"Yes?" her innocent face shining through, it only takes a pointed finger to make her go towards her room. Lokier had given up fighting with them, like anything she said was believed, scuffing her skateboard shoes off the ground; she fiddles with her baggy jeans and spike-bolt belt. Entering the room she glances from side to side, no shark-bait to be seen which was good, his sword was on the wall however but she reframes from touching it; let alone going near it.

Standing looking in the mirror, she fixes the red and black eye shadow, she never saw herself as a Goth or a Punk - the fashion mix was cool in her opinion. It was her week off anyway, so she didn't need to wear any ninja clothing, it meant they were perfectly clean for the occasion. Hearing the clink of metal her eye moves, the sword was crawling towards her again; the reason she hated the sword was because it was the fault, too all of her problems. When no one was looking Samahade would stalk her, she had caught it quite a few times.  
Be that trying to get into her shower or onto the bed, she knew what it wanted as well - chakra. Countless times Kisame and the other's have blamed a sudden mess on her, even though it was the sword knocking it over trying to get too her. The reason it had grown to like her chakra was because it fell on her once, the heavy fat blighter from then on had a certain blood lust. If she didn't watch her back the horrible thing would surely consume all of it, she was only eighteen; the thing trying to eat her chakra would surely kill her, slowly at that.

Side stepping away, the cheese-grater clanks forwards again, a short repetitive 'gi-gi-gi' being produced as it shunts across the floor. Skipping around it, she tries to open the door, the fools had locked the door on her! As a last resort she runs for the bed and stands on it, using a pillow to thump at it when it get's too close. Hearing the door unlock, her head turns to peer at the bulky shoulders of shark-bait, too big to fit in the door without bending down.

"Oh, thank Kami. Your sword was trying to kill me, again!" she plight's, shuddering as he picks it up and glares at her.  
"I told you, Not, to touch Samahade" blinking, she drops her lip and arches her eyes, Lokier rubbing her temple. She had forgotten he didn't believe his sword was stalking her every movement either. Dropping onto the bed mattress she groans, escaping into the bathroom to have a shower while she could. Wandering out in her towel she see's the shark is gone, grabbing a brush a she sits down by the dressing table to dry her hair off.

~Joy to the world, the Leader's dead! We've - barbequed - his head!~ she chants getting up to find something to wear, not noticing the very ginger looming in the doorway. ~What happened to his body? We flushed it down the potty! And round and round it goes, and round and round it…goes?~ glancing innocently at the pale, almost metallic, leader. His grey lifeless eyes portraying utter anger, curling up her lips the glare stays, making her drop the expression.  
"I'm grounded for another week, aren't I?" shutting the door on her face Lokier grunts, sitting down to calmly brush her hair; honestly this base was a giant fun sponge. She couldn't even go outside, without someone having to tail her every move, she had dull silver eyes. Perhaps not as lifeless as Peins, but still creepy and boring, they were great for scaring the haemin's out of people though. Especially in the dark, with a torch put under her chin, a sadistic grin like only Hidan could possibly give in place. Now striding about in little more than her 'battle ready armour' and underwear, she wasn't expecting a hulking great muscle of shark to stomp in. As foul tempered as usual, and hissing under his breath he pauses, a sweat drop running down his brow - to the sight of her singing again, into a hair-brush.

~I got you, I got you on my mind and it's time to make you see what I want. So I'll just make this a little more obvious, cuz I get what I want, and I want you to get with me~  
Her wet locks of brown crimson flicking, her hip knocking from one side, with her back to him.  
~You wanted to come 'round to my house, I didn't know what for. You came up to my bedroom, you said you didn't want me no more. Well you broke my heart, so I dyed your eyebrows blue. And I'm not sorry, that your mates all laughed at you~  
Doing a crazy and stupid dance she bangs her head slightly, her way of breaking tension and hyped emotions.  
~Well you broke my heart, so I broke your nose and I'm not sorry. That I got blood on your clothes~  
Twisting her body stiffens, the shark hadn't even said anything - he was just staring at her, now most people would screech or throw something. She had been around 10 other men from a young age, even Orochimaru! They had always walked in on her in the bathroom, on her getting changed as well.

So Lokier had gotten to a point, where she just didn't care anymore, they could watch her stride in completely butt naked and wouldn't care, nor would she. Not that they would notice either, the sight had become a kind of dull wallpaper. Blinking at him she raises her eyebrow, going back to dancing about, before doing a side skim into the bathroom. The shark can see the top of her head fly up and then back down, she had slipped on a tooth paste bottle on the floor. "Oww~" she pines dizzily, sitting up shakily to rub the back of her head groggily. "Stupid…tooth paste" standing up, she glances at the palm of her hand, great; now she was bleeding from the fall. "Kees! Can you heal the back of my head, please…" wandering over to him he glances up, sighing and using a fast Jutsu on it.  
Touching the now fixed wound, her lips curl up. "Thank you" she smiles, almost cuddling him but restraining her body in the form of a funny looking tensing posture. Scuttling off she gets into her bed and curls up under the covers, it was quiet around the base - which was rare but that wouldn't last long, hearing a sudden bang she groans into her pillow.

Dropping off the bed still bundled in her cover's, she shuffles and pushes herself under her bed. Lokier finally squirming the last few tight edges to get under. Clawing the edge of the panelled flooring, the young girl gets in and drags the blanket's with her. Dropping onto the floor below, and pulling the cover's with her. Peeking out from under the blanket's, Lokier make's sure the area is empty. Slotting the lid up she had come out from over again and glancing about, curling up on a vacant bed she sigh's. It was so quiet here, she had made this room especially for that reason - way back when the base was first found.  
Her very own personal and secret place that she would come to eat, listen to music and have the solitude she deserved sometimes. Not even Pein knew about this room, there was no door or windows but a desk.  
Lokier had put everything down here too, which was why she had barely any worldly possessions, that they knew of; over the years she had collected a numerous amount of stuff. All stored in this room that, granted with her eyes, could be expanded to make even more room. She had thought about connecting up a TV, and a microwave once she had the money together too.

The room had electricity which was powered by only a minuet part of her chakra. Not even Kakuzu could complain that the electricity was being drained, closing her eyes she swoons in and out of her dreamscape. Waking up to a disturbance in the force of her mind, stretching and sitting up to hear thumping on the floor above her. Crawling out from her little room, she lazes underneith her bed. Feeling the metal of the mattress raise up, she pulls the covers over. Groaning at the light hitting her face,  
"Five more minutes..." she groans. Being lifted by the scruff of the neck and shaken. "I'm up, I'm up. Stop shaking me!" she groans sheepishly, thumping to the floor, pulling the cover's off she makes her bed after getting dressed. Sitting at the dining table with a groggy expression her head tilts, another dreamscape opening in which she is being held by a great warrior; both flying through the tree's, from mortal danger.

"Oh, this is so passionate…" Lokier giggles being held tighter near a ridge, the strange man she can't quite see squeezing her closer.  
"Ah, but they're not complete without you. M'lady" laughing together they kiss, his arms pooling on her hips. "Just the right place to…" hearing a horrible set of swearing he lets her go. "Well that's put me right off…" snapping from her dream she glares at Hidan, yelping a little too loudly, but not enough to be heard correctly.  
"Stop blowing my sex!" she snaps, pausing the Jashinist looks at her, still yelping slightly. "I mean, stop blowing your sax… !" she states looking at the table, she had to admit, this base made a girl feel awfully lonely. They where all guys, and what made it worse was the fact that they ignored her, if they wanted to talk they'd have a guys night behind a locked door.

Sighing she could feel the swirls in the back of her mind spinning, while a deep purple shades over her, opening her eyes again she stares at the cereal. Not really concentrating on it however, the little brown chips floating and sinking once they go soggy. Eyes closing again as her head tilts forwards, she hadn't been able to sleep because of an occurring nightmare, at least she thought it was a nightmare. The red head couldn't remember it, only that it scared her into jolting up with a flushed expression, and sweating brow.  
Considering no one would notice she get's up, leaving the untouched cereal behind, out into the cave to watch the hideout. Part of her punishment was to guard an entrance you couldn't get to unless you could fly, perched in the centre of the cave Lokier stares into space. Falling asleep sitting up but it doesn't last until she finds her body shooting up, eyes wide and a bellowing scream penetrating the echoing cave. It takes a good minute to finally calm down, body tightened together as she grips her hair. Hearing voices she tries to unhinge her body, even though there was fear in her eyes she tries to give an innocent expression.

"I heard a scream…" Itachi mutter's in a nonchalant manner, her eyes shifting for a moment, followed by a blink.  
"I didn't…are you sure it came from here?" she enquires looking about, Lokier only just manages to push him off, getting up she goes to the edge. Her cold metallic eyes staring at the rain village below, spinning on her tiptoes and spinning again, as she goes back inside.

~Little girl, little girl why are you crying? Inside your restless soul, your heart is dying. Little one, little one, your soul is purging. Of love and razor blades, your blood is surging~  
She could remember this being sang to her at a young age. ~Run away from the river to the street, and find yourself with your face in the gutter. You're a stray for the salvation army, there is no place like home when you got no place to go~ it wasn't exactly the kind of song a child would expect to be sung.  
~Little girl, little girl your life is calling, the charlatans and saints of abandon. Little one, little one the sky is falling, the lifeboat of deception is now sailing. In the wake all the way no rhyme or reason, your bloodshot eyes will show your heart of treason. Little girl, little girl. You dirty liar. You're just a junkie, preaching to the choir~  
Spinning again, the song felt like home, even if it was perhaps a song someone sang in hatred of her being.

~Run away to your lost tranquillity and find yourself with your face in the gutter, you're a stray for the dregs of humanity. There is no place like home when you got no place to go, the traces of blood always follow you home. Like the mascara tears from your getaway, you're walking with blisters and running with shears. So unholy. Sister of grace~  
Sitting down she hums the tune and flicks the metal bar in her tongue against her teeth once again, the other's would always give her strange looks when she sung this.  
~Run away from the river to the street, and find yourself with your face in the gutter. You're a stray for the salvation army. There is no place like home, when you got no place to go~  
Perhaps it was a song about the Akatsuki, or maybe something to do with her origins, either way sometimes Pein would get angry with her for singing it. Mind you - he got angry at just about everything she did - whether that be singing, training or just standing staring into space.

Sighing she drops down again to stare into space, the rattling of metal makes her pause, turning to look at Samahade right by her shoulder Lokier shuffles away.  
"Stay way from me, you over grown tampon!" she growls with a glare, the sword just drops onto her lap and stills, widening her eyes she stays cautious of the sword. "What, so you suddenly feel sorry?" the red head enquires, prodding the spines that make a jingling sound when released. Thinking curiously, she takes a soft breath.  
~The moment I said it, the moment I opened my mouth. Led in your eyelids, bulldozed the life out of me. I know what you're thinking, but darling you're not thinking straight. Sadly things just happen we can't explain, it's not even light out,but you've somewhere to be~  
The singing seemed to be effecting the strange sword, either whimpering or shuddering into the singing. "Weird" she states, running her pale fingers along it's spines again.  
~Just put back the car keys or somebody's gonna get hurt, who are you calling at this hour? Sit down, come round, I need you now, we'll work it all out together but we're getting nowhere tonight. Now sleep, I promise it'll all seem better, somehow in time~  
Her head had started to tilt as Lokier trails the sword, it was unusual to see Samahade not trying to kill her.

~It's not even light out but suddenly, oh, you've somewhere to be. With no hesitation oh, I've never seen you like this. You're scaring me, you're scaring me to death, I'm losing you, I'm losing you. Trust me on this one I've got a bad feeling, trust me on this one. You're gonna throw it all away, with no hesitation~  
The singing had been starting to put her to sleep, eyes shut this time the thing to wake her up was Kisame; yelling about her having his sword again. Looking up at him she blinks sheepishly, glancing to her arms wrapped around the sword, and curled up on the cold dusty floor.

"Maybe if you kept an eye on it, the sword would stop stalking me" she states sitting up with a yawn, watching him take the sword, he snorts his nostrils. "You're just jealous, that your sword likes me better" she states loudly for him to hear, he says nothing however and leaves. They hadn't always had a conflict between each other, in fact they were close friends at one point. What ruined it was her kissing him, she hadn't meant to scare him off, they had been cuddling a few times before and she mistook his kind gestures for affection. Glancing to the ground she sigh's, perhaps if she hadn't kissed him, then they wouldn't have stopped talking to each other.  
Shark bait wouldn't even look at her, or be in the same room with her, anymore, using any possible reasons just to avoid her.

He would even let her sleep on his bed when it got too cold, or when it started to shoot thunder and lightening, Kami did she hate the stuff. Ever since she learnt metal conducted Lokier never wanted to be near a window, let alone be outside when there was one forecasted. Speaking of which, she stood up and went inside, straight to the TV and turned it on. Ignoring any disgruntled sounds from the leader or company, glaring and curling up against the edge of the sofa her dull eyes flicker.

[As for the weather there is a chance of rain and a heavy shower of---] the TV goes black and her eyes widen, the leader sternly staring as she gives him the eyes; the ones that just couldn't make an innocent or pleading gesture.  
"But I need to know if there is any--" a scroll and a bag being thrown into her lap, staring at it she blinks.  
"You have a mission, get moving" he points at the door, as she glances at the TV, there hadn't been any lightening or rain in sometime.

Perhaps there wouldn't be any, getting up silently she stares at the given objects, skimming past Tobi's building blocks and out the door. Nothing would happen, nothing ever did on her missions, she was always sent on the easy ones. Lokier always had someone behind her too, they wouldn't let her go any where alone because of an offer the snake gave her. Before he left Orochimaru came to see her, saying that if she ever thought of breaking away from the Akatsuki, she was to come find him. Even if the other's disliked the snake, she always thought he was funny, the young woman had considered the offer on many occasions.  
The only thing that was really holding her back before was Kisame, considering he had no intention in talking to her, she didn't see a point in staying. Sitting by a fire she stares into it's flickering flashes, the rain hitting her small aura shield that was keeping her dry.

Who ever was watching her on this mission, must have been soaked to the bone by now. Getting up she puts it out and begins to move again, coming up to a village she goes right through it. No rest for the wicked in her opinion, the sooner she got the mission complete the better. Standing on a branch at her destination the young woman stares at two guards, both watching over a shed like outhouse; this was new - Pein had sent her on a mission, where she would actually get to fight? Humming and contemplating, Lokier plucks two piercing's from her face, rolling the metallic orbs in-between her finger tips.  
With a short Jutsu they suddenly dart from her palm and disappear, jumping down and walking towards them. Smirking as they swing their bodies and drop limply to the ground, going in she takes the hidden scroll and raises her hands above each body. Out from them, the metal appears, stowing them into a hanky she pockets them as she walks.

As per-usual she had complete the mission in under two days, with a good week to spare, there was no way even Pinocchio could complain about it. Wrapping her DJ-style headphones around her neck, the crimson haired girl screech's to her heavy metal like it was a cacophony of dying crows. Hands banging about too portray drums or an electric guitar, her fists punching the air and her head swinging like crazy from side to side, a sight to be held.  
~It's been a long time coming and the tables' turned around, cause one of us is goin' - One of us is goin' down! I'm not runnin', it's a little different now cause one of us is goin' - **ONE OF US IS GOIN' DOWN!!!**~  
Anyone who had been walking close by had long since ran away, terrified of the thundering voice that was scaring even the strongest of beasts. ~Let's take a trip down memory lane, the words circling in my brain. You can treat this like another 'all the same', but don't cry like a **bitch **when you feel the pain!~  
Lokier rarely got to swear, in-fact Hidan had the joy of teaching her the fantastic tingling sensation upon her lips. Pein never forgave the albino, for the day she told him where he could go - with an assortment of colourful words, of course.

~This is hardly worth fighting for but it's the little petty shit, that I can't ignore. With - my - **Fist** - in - your **Face -** and your Face on the floor! It'll be a long time comin', but you got the message now, cause I was never goin'. Yeah, you're the one that's going down!~

Laughing like a giggly hyena the female smiles, this was her way of releasing stress and anger too, just screaming and throwing her weight around made it all better. It had actually started to hale and rain at the same time, deciding to rest she finds a cave and sit's down, a heap of dust rolling away from her hips as she gets comfy. Squeaking and jolting to one side to rub her bum, groaning and picking up a rock to glare threateningly at it. "Stupid rock…" she snaps before sighing, her eyes arching as she pouts softly, she was yelling at a lifeless stone.  
~I'm standin' on the bridge, I'm waitin' in the dark - I thought that you'd be here by now. There's nothing but the rain, no footsteps on the ground, I'm listening but there's no sound. Isn't anyone tryin' to find me? Won't somebody come take me home? It's a damn cold night, I'm tryin' to figure out this life, won't you take me by the hand? Take me somewhere new,I don't know who you are but I'm with you~  
Humming to the music blaring, she lazes up against the stone wall, staring at the rain in a mesmerized state.  
~I'm looking for a place, I'm searching for a face. Is anybody here I know? Cause nothing's going right and everything's a mess and no one likes to be alone~

She had always hated how this song reminded her of the shark, no matter how she sang it or who she was thinking of, they would magically morph into the bulky swordsman. Lokier just couldn't help it, no matter how much she tried to hate him, she just couldn't look at him like he was an enemy, she loved the blue idiot too much. Gripping her head, she thumps her feet on the ground and growls with anger. How could anyone else get through their life, without loving at least one person? That's when it clicked, Kisame had rejected her because he already has a girlfriend, maybe even a wife back home.

Staring at the ground she bites her lip, how could she be so silly, someone who always tended to be rather intelligent, got outdone by her own heart! Gripping the black cloak Lokier sigh's once again, perhaps this new found information would stop her beating heart syndrome, maybe even repel her from staring at the blue toned mans back as he walked about. Or even stop her sneaking in his shower, training, and work out area's too bask in the glory, of which is his god-sent body. Standing up she punches a fist in the air, eyes dazzled with her mouth agape, yes! Her resolution had been found, she would never love that lummox ever again, if this plan didn't work then there was defiantly something very wrong with her!

Not that there wasn't already something wrong with her, she had natural blood-red hair, with streaks that where there since she was a baby and grey eyes. Stomping triumphantly towards the caves mouth there is a thundering clap. Followed by a horrified scream from the member, running (while still screaming) Lokier flings herself behind a rock, at the very back of the cavern. Trembling like a leaf in a hurricane, she clenches her nails into her sleeve's. Curling further, and further, into the corner of the wall.  
Begging it too stop, her spine had crawled out from her back to hide under the rocks. Life flashing beyond her eyes as the piercing's rattle, if this was a nightmare then she wanted it to stop. If only the leader hadn't sent her on the mission, if only he let Lokier watch the weather forecast, then she would be safe at home - and not in the eye of the storm - she wouldn't have took a rest inside the cave, if she had known. Locked to the spot the red head does not move, even well after the ordeal was over, Lokier was stuck to the spot. She wasn't sure if it had perhaps been days since then, all she knew was to stay put and not move, the thunder couldn't get her in the cave.

Meanwhile the base had been surprisingly quiet without her singing, the leader had began to grow impatient waiting for her, the albino just swinging on his chair.  
"Maybe the bitch is dead?" Pein glaring at him, he didn't find the comment, or the monotone the Jashinist had funny. Konan staring at the window silently, while rubbing her arm.  
"I think it would have been wise that we sent someone, to keep an eye on her" the leader grunting and leaning on his elbow, Itachi eating into his dango and giving a short 'hn', every so often through each bite.  
"You shouldn't have sent her off, when you knew there would be a lightening storm. Hn" none of the member's were helping him as he sigh's again.  
"Maybe she…ran off to Orochimaru, un" everyone turning to look at Deidara as he shuffles further into his chair, he had a point though, even if they knew her well they still didn't know how she would act; if given half the chance. It didn't help that on the very first day of her arrival, she actually went straight to the snake, and would follow him like a lamb everywhere he went. Lokier put more effort in for him than anyone else, he was basically her big brother if that was even possible for the sage. Eventually they send someone to look for her, Kakuzu walking with thread constricting her while Hidan looks like he had been through a shredder.

"Kami, what happened?" Konan enquires with wide eyes, the Jashinist whimpering. The teen glares past the gag, and more thread.  
"The fucked up bitch, attacked me!" he snaps trying not to look into the animalistic grey eyes, even Pein was slightly on edge to the sight of such an angry Lokier.  
"Apparently on her mission, she found a new bloodlust, we got the scroll though" the miser states handing it over, not that anyone was in the mood to change the subject from the female, whom was trying to tare through the bindings.?  
"Why, did she attack you?" the leader's monotone serious yet suspicious, the red head's scowling increasing to the clatter of a knife, Tobi wasn't helping as she suddenly takes another flip. Yelling through the gag and bounding at them, the stitch master binding more around her, in an attempt to control the female.  
"Wow, she really doesn't like thunder and lightening" Sasori smirks, not that this was a very amusing moment, everyone seemed to suddenly calm down at this point.  
"Put her in her room, she just needs to time to settle" the metallic man states as the bulky tanned nin is physically forced to drag the woman, along the corridor. The albino standing well clear of the enraged beast, whom would probably attack just about anyone, at that given moment. After a good few hours Lokier finally slumps down on the wall, falling asleep with a pillow clenched between her teeth.


	2. Chapter 2

Waking up to stare about the room, apparently the shark had to sleep in the living room, until it was clear she wouldn't try to eat him. Coming out from the room, she pays little attention to anyone, she had to know if her thing for Kisame had been cleansed. Looking at him she waits for it, the butterflies, the thumping heart, any kind of bowel movements - that might signal anything. Watching him step in her eyes tick to his strides, her heart sinking to a sudden feeling of pain, moving her eyes to the bowl she tenses. It was pointless, she still had that spinning tingle in her body for the beefcake. Now it hurt all the more that she longed for someone, she couldn't have. Now what? She couldn't go on begging for him, he wasn't going to return the feelings, but Lokier couldn't go on living like she was. Drifting on a hope he would leave this beloved and come to her, she didn't want to be that woman who stood at the window. Waiting in a dream with a face that would be kept in a jar, tilting her head further she stares at her clenched fists.  
"Egg's, or bacon?" someone enquires, Lokier gives a dazed stare, looking at the plate before getting up.  
"I'm not hungry" disappearing out the room, she slowly traipses the hallway. Gripping her chin as she stares gently to her toes, why did life have to be so difficult? Deciding to spend some time cleaning out the attic, that Pein had been complaining about for some time, Lokier rustles through some boxes. Smiling tenderly when she finds her old pictures, one of which was her pulling Pein's piercing, while some have her falling asleep on the sofa.

Flicking through a grey book, she looks at old pictures of the leader as a child. Him, Konan, and a boy who was Nagato. Standing together, even some of Jiraiya and the ginger posing together was in the file. Choking on bits of dust, the redhead opens up a large chest, presumably Orochimaru's old stuff. Gasping to the sight of her chopsticks wrapped up in a cloth, she had given them to him after they broke, she hadn't stopped crying over them until they finally convinced her the brand new ones where her old ones - and that she had only dreamt they had snapped.  
Pulling through old files she snigger's at the pictures of past and present members, Kakuzu looked so young back then. Hidan, Deidara and Itachi looked just like chibi's even if they where pouting. But the shark was the best, he looked like a happy go-lucky teen, with a super massive blue afro. Blushing she finds amusement in the tiny little flytrap on Zetsu's shoulders, his eyes crossed and teeth bared; apparently even then, he was arguing with himself. Boxing things to be thrown and things to be kept, she finds more in her keeping pile. Not that Lokier would show them the embarrassing pictures that she wanted to keep. #

Going to the darkest part of the dusty, dark and yet surprisingly warm loft, the red head opens up a rusting silver chest. Full of papers that were apparently 'top secret', it looked like documents on experiments, one had a swirling train track and a picture of the frog master at the side. Reading it slowly she begins to crease her forehead, shuffling through she reads more files, they were starting to worry her.  
[After many trials, I have managed to successfully cross Jiraiya's DNA, with Hanzo's] a diary entry states in chicken scratch, how he got their DNA was beyond her. [Soon enough, I will be able to raise the perfect weapon] gulping she keeps reading, and reading. [I have successfully convinced the leader, that Lokier is a trustable person. Like I hoped he took her under his wing, without thinking twice] shaking her head, her eyes widen further, she…was an experiment? Flicking the pages further she comes to the last of his entries, her eyes scanning it up and down.

[The leader caught me trying to take Itachi's DNA to cross with Lokier, I'll have to abandon the trials. My only hope is that he doesn't figure out what his 'friend' is] Lokier gasps, shutting the book that felt as if it was screaming. The faces pulling from the pages, as if they where the wailing dead, trapped in the walls - like in some horror movie. Sitting there contemplating this, she has a blank expression, this basically meant she wasn't human - didn't it? Getting up, she puts the diary and other information in her keep box, at the very bottom, all of it. She wanted to know how much of her, wasn't real. Clearing everything else away, she takes first priority to her boxes, putting them in her secret headquarters, in the living room she storms up to the leader. Opens her mouth wide, and prepares too belt out the questioning words, 'did he know about it?' Suddenly stilling her mind whizzes with more thought, if he didn't and found her a threat; he'd kill her on the spot, wouldn't he? The metallic man stares at her with curiosity, and surprise at her sudden outburst, then stiff body, flinching when she cuddles him.

"I love you~" she mumbles sweetly, the leader standing in frozen shock, looking rather gob smacked. The Lokier he knew did not, in a million years, hug him and say those specific three words.  
"What do you want?" his first instinctive question, she would only do this when either, she had broken something, or wanted something that would cost a lot of money. Stepping away, with hands behind her back, she shakes her head.  
"Nothing" she smiles cutely, skipping off out the door leaving the room silent.  
"The dust's gone to her head, un" the blonde states with wide eyes and a blink, Pein wasn't convinced but at the same time he was too confused to even say anything, let alone think.

Back in her room she sit's reading the journal with a stern yet enthralled expression, flicking another page as the shark enters, her head doesn't rise, nor do her eyelashes bat an inch to his presence. Gulping she could feel her hairs rising, this book of notes was so thrilling and yet bone chilling, the sort of fear only the thought of lightening could give her. Licking her inside of her bottom lip she turns another page, head sinking deeper into the book with awe, she knew Kisame had said something but she hadn't heard it.  
"Dinner is read-- Is Lokier R-reading?" Sasori enquires in a shocked manner, the shark nodding as he gets up to come to the door. Lokier stowing away the book and pulling out another one, pretending to have finished it as she walks down the corridor, even through dinner she sat reading. A lot of them had, had to look twice as they walked in, some watching her fork almost go into the mash then into her mouth empty. Every so often she would manage to get a mouth full, surprisingly her lifeless eyes had been sparking with life, Pein had began to get bored of the awkward silence at the table. Yeah, sometimes he liked complete silence, but at the dinner table was just strange. Let alone the way Lokier had been acting all day, since coming back from the mission like a nut-job.

"What are you reading?" Konan enquires as she flicks the page, her lips pursing with amusement, as she glances up questioningly.  
"Oh, uh…a book" she smiles, Pein place a hand to his face and groan, Konan rolling her eyes at the blunt answer.  
"What book?" the blue haired woman enquires, watching the red heads expression change with every paragraph, she had actually found a surprisingly enjoyable pass time.  
"Ohm…" shutting it she blinks at the cover, no wonder she recognised the content. "The book of Jashin…edition 1 of 5" reopening it she ignores Hidan choking on his swallowed fork, and Pein's dying horror of an expression. "Done…can I have book 2 now?" the albino was still dying as everyone sits staring at her, pursing her lips she pulls her kimono shirt to one side, slipping her hand in, to pull another one out. Opening as she gets up to walk away, everyone glancing at each other, what where they supposed too say to that? The female had eventually stopped listening to music out loud or singing, in-fact she had apparently become the kind, who you would only hear reading out loud. Even her vocabulary had grown to a point that she was able to understand, and state, facts off the tip of her tongue, as much as they where pleased she had found a less demanding hobby, they were suspicious. Not even a bookworm read for as long as her, or as many books at one time, she would read through the night, through the morning, she even gave her T.V. time to who ever gave her the best novel.

~The fury of a demon instantly possessed me, I knew myself no longer. My original soul seemed, at once, to take its flight from my body; and a more than fiendish malevolence, gin-nurtured, thrilled every fibre of my frame. I took from my waistcoat-pocket a pen-knife, opened it, grasped the poor beast by the throat, and deliberately cut one of its eyes from the socket! I blush, I burn, I shudder.~  
She reads aloud from the sofa, a thick book of Edgar Allen Poe tight in her grasp as she flicks the page, eyes widening at the horrors untold and yet right in front of her face.  
~It was now the representation of an object that I shudder to name --and for this, above all, I loathed, and dreaded, and would have rid myself of the monster had I dared --it was now, I say, the image of a hideous--of a ghastly thing --of the GALLOWS!--oh, mournful and terrible engine of Horror and of Crime--of Agony and of Death!~  
Shuddering, she looks up from the book with awe, muttering the words over and over.  
"Oh…the chilling wonder's of which is Poe, how I dream to be in a time and a place, of which I could see such a scene" Kakuzu twitches his eyebrow as she starts nestling the book, if she got any closer to it; then he could of sworn she had a book fetish, a dangerous one. Wandering into the living room a little later she prods the leader, he seemed to look at her with surprise, she had left her room without the book for once.

"What does, be-beguiling, mean?" she enquires tilting her head, she hadn't done that since the day she asked how they got the chocolate chips into the ice cream.  
"Something that's misleading because it's pleasant, or alluring" he mutter's as she rubs her chin, cuddling him and wandering off out the door again, presumably to read once again. The truth was there were words in the diaries she couldn't understand, she wanted to know everything and understand ever bit of it, the other books where just a distraction when she couldn't read them; it was great, she forgot about Kisame most of the time and was passing the time of her grounding's. Soon enough she wouldn't be a jail bird anymore, she could go out on walks, not that it was the walks she was interested in - it was the freedom to go to Orochimaru, she wanted an idea of the facts before she went striding up to him with a demanding expression.

As much as she loved Pein, she couldn't sit and pretend she didn't know anything about herself, not after reading this book. If only they could understand or begin to be told all these facts, she just feared they'd all turn on her, banish her from their happy little 'family'. Even if leaving to see the snake was a death penalty, the nin didn't want to leave it there, she could figure out a way to make it up to Pein later. Explain the situation when she knew what it was that she is, if the female was Jiraiya, or Hanzo; she hoped to high heaven she was worth something, and not a discarded experiment that was supposed to be someone much better. The problem being she had a good month before that freedom was hers, but she also had to remove their suspicion or they wouldn't trust her sudden urge to go out side. First things first, as she pulled out her music player, and started to shuffle down the hallway. It seemed to stir a ruckus, they hadn't heard such classics from her in some time.

~Annie are you ok? Are you ok, Are you ok, Annie? Would you tell us that you're ok, there's a sign in the window, that he struck you a crescendo Annie. He came into your apartment, left the bloodstains on the carpet then you ran into the bedroom. You were struck down it was your doom~  
She chants, sloshing her hip towards the table, to eat her salad. Just because she had to be herself, didn't mean she was going to jeopardise her brand new body. ~Annie are you ok, are you ok? Are you ok Annie? You've been hit by, you've been struck by a smooth criminal~  
Her entire body sliding across the floor in socks to the chair, her fingers up like guns as she bops her head softly.

"…Lokier is back" Sasori seemed to not be the only one happy to see it, the base needed that little bit of the 'singing idiot'. Or it was a black and white picture. The sort of thing that happened in the Mc-fly videos, where the girl got sucked into the T.V which was filled in colour. Glancing at the book case she grunts, oh how they where calling her name, but she couldn't touch them. Pursing her lips together she flicks a tomato up into the air and catches it in her mouth, she hadn't played with her food in some time, throwing another she catches it on her nose to balance.  
While reading she had even taken the time to train, she was thin like an hourglass and loved it. At least she wasn't the wallpaper anymore, it was great getting a hello from people as she passed them now. The female supposed she was being a kind of escape artist, running from her fears and worries, but she had to admit the migraines from stress where decreasing. And the heartache of her broken love wasn't whistling it's way into the room, as it used to. But it would change soon, because she was running out of things to keep her occupied.

~Oh, I can show if you want to know exactly how to say her name. To make her scream and shout, but not from pain. Ecstasy is all that she'll feel when you kiss her lightly, it's frightening. There is no room for sparks, show her lightning~  
She chants getting up and striding out, emphasising the 'oh~' as she goes, she was a little sadistic, but that was part of her nature. It seemed to work, the plan, everyone was ignoring her soon enough; and as long as she kept out of trouble then no one would say anything. Twirling about she skims through the kimono's, she managed to take from Konan, she had worked of the fat while being 'good' to fit into them.  
~I thought I saw a man brought to life, he was warm, he came around like he was dignified. He showed me what it was to cry, well you couldn't be that man I adored. You don't seem to know, don't seem to care, what your heart is for, but I don't know him anymore~  
Staring into the mirror she smiles, playing with a fan and flapping it in front of her face, wandering outside someone cough's, yelling a little too loudly.

"Who brought a geisha into the base?!" backing up, she pokes her head in then her entire body, hands on her hips as she pouts.  
"I can't look that bad…" she glares pointing at Itachi, her varnished nail that was filed to perfection, stabbing him in the nose gently.  
"Are you on drugs?" Hidan states, looking her up and down, Lokier in a dress was a scary concept even if she was a woman, they probably saw her as a man anyway.  
~I was gonna clean my room until I got high, I was gonna get up and find the broom but then I got high. My room is still messed up and I know why - cause I got high~  
She laughs spinning about the living room, stealing the weasels dango as she goes, the albino asked for it.  
~I'm gonna stop singing this song because I'm high, I'm singing this whole thing wrong, because I'm high. And if I don't sell one copy I know why - cause I'm high~  
Dropping onto the sofa, she flicks her head and fingers to the tune in her head, Pein didn't seem very happy with her singing but she presumes the reason he hadn't said anything, was because he was too confused by the kimono.

"Huuuu…someone broke my gun-devil's record?" her eyes sparking with awe, fair enough it was a single point but that was rather annoying. Plugging up the controllers she curls up into herself to play, gritting her teeth and twisting her body every so often to show off her skills. Pausing Lokier gasps and stares at the screen, a shrill giggle startling any passer's by as she snigger's into the sleeve.  
"What's so funny?" someone enquires as she tries to calm herself down, shaking her head as she skips off out, pulling out a scroll to wave in Pein's face.  
"Can I have this? I found it in the attic…" shrugging at his silence Lokier takes this as a 'I don't care', and skip's off to the training room. Peering around she sit's down and opens the scroll, almost choking on the ancient dust being sucked into her lungs. It looked like a weapon summon, grinning like a wolf she sit's for hours learning it, coming in to take a step back. Kisame was looming over a fish tank, coming to see what he was looking at, the crimson hair starts to prick. Snorting she leans to see the ugliest looking brute she had ever seen, the shark doesn't find her laughing very amusing.  
"New…fish?" she enquires, the creature with eyes like golf balls coming towards her, she almost topples with laughter when it's pupils get larger then become cross-eyed.  
"Yes, he is…and he doesn't appreciate you laughing" he glares, as she puts a finger to the glass, the silly thing bumping it's head off the tank.  
"Heh…he's kinda cute" she blushes pretending to stroke his head, it didn't help that it's head was huge, and his body was fat.  
"…Really?" shark bait seems unsure of that remark, the girl standing back up and nodding.

"What's his name?" she enquires curiously, the shark shrugging as she brightens up. "Can I name him?" Lokier glancing at him as she bends back down to look at the fish, Kisame raises his eyebrow.  
"Fair enough…" giggling, she circles her finger to see it belly roll like a croc for her, for an ugly looking thing it wasn't that bad.  
"I'll call him…Itachi!" she smiles, lifting her finger then going back down. "You like that name don't you?" she smiles seeing it 'nod' to her finger movements, shark bait twitching his eyebrow at the name. "Yes you do~" she coo's, rubbing it's head again, she had been blocking the tank as someone wander's past. "Itachi is the cutest thing ever, yes he is. Awww look at his crossed eyed smile…Kisame--Kisame…look he's smiling!" she laugh's, Pein coming over calmly but inside there was a over-protective defence for the conversation. "Leader, look! Isn't Itachi adorable?" she enquires moving out of the way, the leader grabbing his mouth, when he stares right at the googly eye'd fish. "Aww, he has such round cheeks…whoa I never knew goldfish could have a bucktooth. He looks like something you would find on 'Invader Zim'." she was in awe of her new friend, even if the shark probably wouldn't let her near it after this.

Lokier was now questioning how she was related to either amphibian master, she was a daft-punk while they were just - boring. "Ah, I wanted a battle session…I have been training a lot. So I wanted to know, if I've gotten stronger or not" she smiles watching the ginger nod, for once he was letting her fight another member, maybe her grown-up attitude was working? That next morning Lokier sat waiting for everyone else to get up, it was rare that she was the first and not the last to come eat breakfast. Glancing to Kisame she holds out a plate, there were at least fifty slices of bread on the plate.  
"Sandwich?" the red head enquires, holding it up as he takes one and raises his fine blue eyebrow. "I didn't wake you did I?" she enquires with a blink, shaking his head she closes up the rest of her cloak before sitting down to wait for the leader to come get her.  
"I taught Itachi to headbang, isn't that awesome?" the redhead enquires, her eyes juddering with excitement. Kisame wasn't a morning person however.  
"It's a bit early to be up?" he enquires, while she just stares at the clock, her eyes twitching to each tic-toc the hands give.  
"The early bird catches the worm…" she states, pouting as the shark sits back down, she wanted to tell him of her new toy but decided that perhaps, it was best she left her new devise as a surprise for the member's that watch her fight.

"You wouldn't happen know who I'm up against, would you?" she questions curiously, as the shark thinks about it.  
"Most likely Hidan…he's--" she cover's his mouth with alarm, making him stare in confusion.  
"Shh~ I want it to be a surprise! If I know what I'm up against, it wont be any fun" she chirps in a bubbly manner, moving her finger's away. Sitting back down on the chair, the shark stares at her for a moment.  
"You're…very strange" this makes her tilt her head, looking him up and down with a smirk.  
"Well, you're no Mona Lisa yourself!" she smirks, making him mumble then smirk along with her. Staring at him as he eats, something clicks inside her head. Tilting further she thinks about something else. "Wait…if your shark like - I never thought about this. Does that mean you have---" he takes his own turn to grab her mouth, and silence her.  
"Yes." he plainly states making her blink then shift her head away.  
"Wow really? You have to show me sometime!" this makes him stop and tilt his head in confusion, once again.  
"Show you…what?" his blue skin turning purple as she blinks, opening her mouth to an ajar motion.  
"Teach me how to breath under-water!" this makes him go a brighter purple than before, while she blinks and moves closer. "Why are you going purple?" she innocently enquires, Kisame coughing behind his fist while waving one hand.

"No reason, never mind…and breathing under water is just a simple Jutsu" giving him another confused expression, she just nods her head, glancing round for the clock again.  
"You want another sandwich?" nodding she hands them over, by now Kakuzu and Hidan had stepped in.  
"I'm going to kick your ass cause I'm fu--!" grabbing the albino's mouth, she gives a stern glare towards him, letting go and dropping back down to be at his chest to stare up at him.  
"Don't tell me! I don't want to know, it would ruin the game" she states putting the sharks bread down, sitting back on the chair casually while the albino gives a perplexed stare. Shark-bait shakes his head in a manner for him too just drop what had just happened, and eat. Peering at the clock she puts her head on the table in a bored fashion, watching Konan's cat wander in, it barely appeared from the garden outside but it was there. To her shock it had black pattern's all over it's coat, making her eyes widen. "Captain cotton-swab! What happened to you?" pulling the cat up it mew's in annoyance as Hidan puts his thumb up.  
"The cat is now pure, with the power of Jashin-sama!" he cackles as she cradles the hapless white cat, or what was left of it's white fur.  
"Y-you put the cat under some sinful, cult like curse?" she squeaks, making the albino suddenly scowl and burst up in anger.  
"My fucking religion is not a cult, you little bitch!" petting the cat she pouts, starting too cuddle it again.  
"Poor Captain cotton-swab! Don't worry, I'll get this off your fur, and keep you away from that, evil, devil worshiping, sinner!" she mumbles sweetly to the cat, who looks at them as if it were about to cackle evilly, at any moment. Everyone was staring at the albino, who by now had a face redder than an erupting volcano.

"Let's see you say that, after this you fucking whore!" he snaps doing something, then throwing water at her, wiping her face she gives a short disgruntled voice.  
"Eww…it smells like Kakuzu's old arm chair!" she mope's, trying to get it out of her clothes, with a simple cleaning Jutsu.  
"Hidan! You can't just do that to members! un" Deidara snaps, hearing the leader come in and stop, a pin could of dropped as the leader stares at Lokier's face then at the cat, followed right to Hidan.  
"What…did you do to her?" grinning, he points but before he can say a word, the teen had began to bleat out in annoyance.  
"He just attacked me with unholy pee, and turned me and captain cotton-swab into devil worshiping sinners! I'm going to go to hell for this!" the albino growls loudly at this, before grabbing his scythe.  
"Your fucking dead!" he yells loudly making her cringe, then pull her head up from the cloak.  
"Actually, I'm alive and breathing thanks" she coo's at him, she just found amusement in his anger, a kunai being thrown but it is deflected by her forehead protector. Watching she smiles at the albino's defeat when it hit's him, with the blunt edge, in the forehead - knocking him too the floor. "Save it for the fighting ring, Slick-moves" she laughs getting up and leaving the room, she was getting better and better at this winning thing.


	3. Chapter 3

In the dojo like training ground, that was at least two houses big. Lokier stands calmly to one end while Hidan stands to another, Pein in the middle while everyone stands on the sidelines watching from afar.  
"Go when you're ready!" he shouts disappearing back into the shadow's before the lights switch on for them, Lokier stands patiently with her hands buried inside the cloak for warmth while the albino grins mockingly.  
"Ready to die bitch?!" the albino snaps loudly, watching her nod and wait for him to start moving, holding up his scythe he begins to run towards her. Her body twitching from right to left while she hops gently backwards, to dodge every swipe he can give. Swinging it at her feet Lokier jumps upwards while using his shoulder to hop behind him and give his back a heavy kick, wandering forwards and turning she watches in a casual manner, to him getting back up. "Stop messing around and fucking fight!" he yells, running with the scythe held up high, ducking her leg swings out, while she turns on one hand to trip him over. Placing both hands down she flips backwards onto her tip toes a couple of meters away from him, to again watch the albino get up, pulling out a pole the albino cuts his wrist and starts to draw a symbol on the ground while she watches.

"Oh your fucking dead when I'm through with you!" he snaps finishing the red diagram on the ground, charging for her again. Grabbing the shaft to his scythe Lokier kicks him in the chest, twisting the weapon in his wrist as she goes, too make him let go. Holding his weapon while he holds the rope, she stares at it and starts to swing it round and around on her wrist, in a mocking manner. Glaring he growls when some of the other members laugh, how bad of a fighter was he? Taking a firm grip he pulls the rope forwards, but she doesn't budge.  
"A tug of war?" she enquires playfully, suddenly ripping the albino from the ground and into the air, swinging her shoulder with the end of the scythe on the ground she watches the poor Akatsuki member spin. "Hidan-o-copter!" she chimes suddenly swinging the rope one way, and lashing it downwards the other - sending Hidan into the concrete of the floor with a crack, some wince while other's cheer.  
"I was expecting something more interesting than this…" she pouts throwing the scythe to the ground beside him, coming over she uses her foot to push him onto his back. "You alright, Slick?" her head tilt's as she bounces backwards, when a kunai is shot up at her, the dagger hits as a pinprick of blood suddenly slides onto his thumb nail. Taking a few hops backwards the albino get's up, snickering into the red symbol, everyone gasping as she gives a confused expression.  
"Your fucked!" he cackles, making her seem rather excited. She seems more interested than anyone else, but that was only because she knew nothing of what he was about to do, the black and white appearing on his skin again; as he licks the blood from his nail, with a smirk.

Watching cautiously Lokier cheerily stands, idly waiting for something to happen, a pole is taken from his robe and flicked out into a sharp point, that he licks it as well making her eyebrow raise.  
"You like licking things…" she points out, shaking her head slightly to lose the thought, then readies her hands to perform a counter attack.  
"With your blood I can stab myself and force you into pain, of course it will feel like pleasure for me and I wont be the one dying when I hit a vital point" he cackles sticking it through his wrist, making her wince, glaring down at her wrist that was starting to throb horribly. "Feel the pain?" he cackles loudly, stabbing it through his shoulder this time, watching her grip the cloak and give a hissing sound. Pulling her hand away ,she stares at the blood with wide eyes. "Aw, you look fucking scared!" he laughs watching her rub the blood off onto her side, so she can't look at it. Turning her eyes to the red diagram, that was the cause, trying to move the albino places the pole to his heart. "Move and I'll fucking stab you in the heart, your stuck bitch" he smirks watching the crimson haired woman stick her head into the cloak and rustle about, his pole stabbed into his hand to make her drop the scroll in her grips.

Poking her head out to watch it roll, she glare's then turns her eyes to Hidan, smuggly searching his mind for some where else to stab, the pole aimed for his abdomen, stabbing it in her eyes widen. Dropping down onto her knee's too cringe at the pain. "I'd like to see you have kids now, you fucking bitch!" he laughs only watching her reach out and grab the parchment, stabbing into his arm she tightens her grip on the paper while shakily getting up.  
"Never wanted, any" she mumbles, through shaky agony. Starting to unroll the scroll, Hidan placing the pole to his leg as he stabs it in to knock her down, Lokier crying out in distress.  
"I fucking dare you to do it!" he yell's with a loud and cynical laugh, watching her stick two finger's down onto the scroll, glaring the albino starts to press the weapon into his chest, while she breaths heavily. "You a' suicidal bitch, or are you just a fucking stupid one?" watching her finger run down the scroll her head drops, smoke bursting out which makes the albino glare, peering at the small blur getting bigger.

When it settles the albino stares with wide lilac eyes, much like everyone else, to the stuffed doll sitting in her place. The puppet sticking it's tongue out, and pulling it's eyelid down while it rocks from side to side. Hidan turning his head about for her, unknown to which that she was above him. Lokier knew she couldn't hit him, since any damage too him, would just cause her more pain. "Come out and fight, you fucking heathen! Or are you scared at the might of Jashin?!" Lokier stare's down from the ceiling rafter were no one else could see her, it would seem he wasn't going to hurt himself unless he knew were she was.  
Taking out another scroll the female thinks over her options, her best bet was to just hop down and kick him, Lokier was fast enough but if he saw her before she managed to drop down, then she would be in trouble. Perhaps if she was to sneak up and throw him, then he wouldn't be able to do anything, but then the red head would need something to heavy drop down. To shatter the symbol so it couldn't be used again. Closing her eyes, she thinks about it before staring at her weapon scroll, the sound of it being opened would draw attention. Even if she was fast enough, the albino would know instantly, and start stabbing himself again. Opening her eyes to stare round, Lokier notice's that everyone had started chattering.

"I think she's run away!…" Sasori points out broadly, Pein glare's at this while Konan shaking her head.  
"What a weakling…she'll turn up somewhere" Itachi states, Lokier starts concocting, if they thought she was gone then Hidan would leave the circle. Using that to buy time, she could summon and shoot downwards, he'd be too slow to do anything as she smashes the symbol; and by then he either has a choice of fighting or calling it quits - which would look bad on his part. They were always telling her to take advantage of anything, during a battle, even if it's a training match everything is a key use for survival.  
"Hidan, there's no point. She's run off, un!" Deidara shouts out, the albino grumbling about it being a waste of a good sacrifice. Lokier pulls out her scroll, and opens it up. Biting her lip as she waits, her heart racing, as he steps away towards the group. Each tic'ing seond in her eardrum throbbing, there was her chance as she makes her move. Everyone turning when there is a massive boom from the ceiling, blinking with confusion as they watch Lokier plummet down from the end of a large clam like mallet, towards the symbol.

"FUCK!" he albino screeches, watching her grin deviously, hitting the mark point blank, cracks and parts of the floor coming up like an earthquake. "You little bitch!" he snaps, watching her stand on top with her arms slung round the shaft with a smile, pulling the orange goggles - she found from the attic - up from her eyes to rest on her forehead. Waving as everyone stares with wide eyes, they where starting to realise that they knew little about her, that they thought they knew alot about.  
"I really do like this girl!" Kakuzu jeers with a laugh while she smiles brightly, jumping down she lifts the conch like mallet upwards onto her shoulder, making her bounce slightly.  
"W-what is that thing?! Un" Deidara plights pointing to the shell that suddenly opens up to show red skin, and a single large yellow eye that stares back sending shudders down his spine.  
"Nothing you would, hopefully, have to fight" she smiles, tilting her head before glancing towards the albino. "Call it quits, or are you still wanting to play with me?" the albino grabs his scythe with a cocky smirk.  
"I'd like to see you fight me, with that fucked up piece of shit" the clam slams shut then opens making her shift backwards.  
"Calm down…" she mumbles as it's single eye slits in anger, slamming shut once more to make a clamping sound.  
"Hah, you can't even fucking control the fucker!" he cackles watching her shift her feet to keep balance, swinging it from her shoulder into both hands, the eye twists to stare at him with a glare.

"Oh, I have control over him…it's just that he doesn't take kindly to rudeness" she smiles as it shuts again, the spines growing out in his direction.  
"Hidan! Don't do it, not even I know what that horrible thing is going to do!" Konan plight's, the eye swivels to glance at her, the albino pretends to spit.  
"This little shit is probably glued to the ground…" Lokier glances emotionlessly to the clam that stares back, both seeming rather delighted as she suddenly bursts into a fast run. Right around the albino, as he tries to twist his head, but by the time he's turned, she's already on the other side. The blurs multiplying with trailing smoke until all of them skid to a halt for the albino to stare at 10 more Lokier's, all circling as they giggle, the clams all starting to stare seriously.  
All arms knocking out with the clams pointed at him, the spines growing longer, like sword's as they all jump upwards. The Albino had no chance to even move, before the hand seals were sent, the mallet's began their brutal attack when the words where shouted with glee.

"Katon Goukakyuu, Harem, Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!!" the clam's eyes widen in an uproar as Lokier turns into a naked woman, immobilising Hidan with a nose bleed, Itachi's eyes widening to the clams missiles turning into great balls of fire, while Hidan begins to get crushed under the weight of the 'Harem' Jutsu. Everyone covering their eyes to the bright light from the fire, the ground is scorched by the end and thrown in all direction's, as the red head turns on her heel to try evade the blast. The clones bursting one by one in the crossfire, while she jumps and twists away from the shells thorns, the tremendous and devastating attack leaves everyone unsure of what too say.  
Watching the woman burst from her nude form, and the mallet disappear back into the scroll, that is re-hidden from sight. Everyone crowding round the crater to see a rather crispy, and torn albino, in pieces all over the floor. Everyone turning their heads to her, as she beats a fist into the air. "Woo!" she chants, moon walking and doing the MC-hammer across the ground. "Who's the man? I'm the man!" she grins toothily, almost floating on air out the room, her first practise battle with an S-rank and she won it like a Sage. The leader looking for her later, as he enters the living room.

She had been feeding Itachi, her lips puckered as she flaps her hands, slowly at her cheeks like fins. Popping her mouth as the fish swims about eating, the ginger leader eliminating the light coming down on the pair.  
"I want a word with you." his voice serious and cold, Lokier straightening her back, giving a perplexed stare. For sometime now, he had been sneaking about in his room. Not that Pein didn't already do that all the time anyway. The redhead watching him finally re-emerge from the shadows, raising her eyebrow to him placing a finger to his lips. Lokier jumps when he suddenly bellows, in an angry voice and a stern glare. The member would have fought back, hadn't she known he was up too something, 'If you so much as harm another hair on…', being one of the comments. 'It was in-appropriate of you to have…', it had finally dawned on her that he was kissing Konan's butt.

Lately she had been sneaking about at night, Lokier doubted the Leader knew what was going on. In a way the leader was probably too blinded, to see that the blue woman had been acting strange. To be honest, even Lokier didn't know what was going on, but it probably was Konan sneaking to where Pein's office was. They were apparently closer than some thought, it had been a rumour until the ginger got angry and yelled, that him and Konan weren't a couple. Lokier knew that the roller-coaster did have affection for her, but she wasn't sure if Konan felt the same way back. "You're a good kid" he whisper's rubbing her head, actually smiling, he rarely did that for anyone.  
Lokier must have really made an impression, her cheeks tinting a gentle pink, from the compliment. Leaving the room with a slam she storms down the hallway and into her room, using this chance to her advantage, Lokier goes to her own bedroom and slams the door once. Opening it screech an, 'I hate you, I hate I hate you', before slamming it shut again.  
There wasn't a word later that night from anyone, the crimson haired female had to stick her face in a fashion magazine. Too keep anyone from seeing the giant grin plastered upon her face, she was quite the little actress when given half the chance. Lokier couldn't even look at the leader, she was afraid she would burst into hysteric laughter, Konan seemed pleased however. Her mind is taken back to something hitting her, looking to a letter with her name on it she 'coos', picking it up to sniff. Sliding back and sighing, not taking a moment longer to tear it open. She would have used her teeth if no one was watching her, her eyes flashing it up and down, her body swooning again.

"Who's that from?" Itachi whisper's to anyone in particular, the one who brought in the mail shrugging, there was no name on it when it came in. Just the redheads in scratchy writing, it must have been someone special anyway- probably a fan-girl band monthly letter.

[Hey there Lokier, what's it like in Amegakure City? I'm a thousand miles away but girl, tonight you look so pretty. Yes you do, no a kunai can't shine as bright as you - I swear it's true] the letter read, almost like a rhythmic poem, Lokier trying not to cry, giggle or become shy. Not in public of the Leader, and the members.  
[Don't you worry about the distance, I'm right there if you get lonely. Give this letter another feathered touch, close your eyes. Listen to my voice, it's my disguise. I'm by your side] Lokier hadn't figured out that people had began looming over her shoulder, reading the precious words that where her own privacy.  
[A thousand miles seems pretty far, but they've got snakes, and dog's, and toad's . I'd walk to you if I had no other way, our friends would all make fun of us. We'll just laugh along because we know, that none of them have felt this way] sighing and cuddling the parchment there is snickering, her ears finally fazing in to hear them.

"Even more in love with me you'd fall~" someone laugh's, shaking their hip and cupping their cheeks, someone else giving her a puckered kissing face. All kind of hell broke lose inside her head, not only had they desecrated her privacy, but they had began mocking her. Standing up a puff of smoke creates a microphone, Pein had been making fun of her as well, now she wasn't happy anymore. Taking a deep breath she plugs her ears, the group watching in a confused manner, some still making fun of her. Coughing to clear her throat and then glancing to her music player, biting her lip and tapping her foot slightly.  
Suddenly screaming down the scroll, an eardrum shattering screech polluting the air. Everyone grabbing their ear's and cringing, her volume increasing with the pitch. The female beginning to sound like a hissing kettle, this goes on until at least Hidan has blood coming out of his nose and eardrums. The rest where completely tone-deaf, finally stopping she smiles, pulling away the headphones to speak.

"Have I made my point clear?" she enquires, everyone looking around, apparently she had completely removed their ability to hear. They can only see her mouth moving, a cocky and arrogant smile plastered on her face. Writing something she holds up the board, [I'll fix your hearing, If you never read my private property. Ever again, that means my diary - Leader. Oh and I don't get grounded, either] her eyes slit cheekily, an eyebrow raised as they groan into the pain, Hidan seemed paralyzed because of the attack - again.  
Nodding she does a simple click of the finger's, apparently she had put a deafening Jutsu on them. It had been a few days since then, everything settled again, Lokier curled up staring at the floor silently. She had found more diaries in the cellar, all hidden where he apparently did his experiments. It had begun to get complicated, but she had to stay strong, glancing at blue feet as they drift past. And then back to the floor again, she had been thinking about a new song, it seemed to really openly talk about her plans.  
~So I've made up my mind, I will pretend to leave this world behind. And in the end, you'll know I've lied. To get your attention, I'm faking my own suicide~ she mumbles getting up, it was her turn to watch the cavern of complete pointlessness.  
~I'm faking my own suicide, because I know you love me. You just haven't realized, I'm faking my own suicide. They'll hold a double funeral, because a part of you will die along with me~ cheerily she stares about the cave, counting the rocks and blowing at the dirt in the sunlight. Hidan and Konan walking past, talking to each other casually and laughing. There was something about it that put knots in her stomach, she just knew something horrible was going to happen. When something was wrong she would sometimes feel ill, it was her way of concluding if someone lied to her or not. Eyeing them they speed up and disappear into the forest, that was when Pein appeared. Staring at her back as Lokier creases her eyebrow, she didn't like this at all.

"Have you seen Konan?" the auburn leader enquires, the woman pointing towards the forest.  
"She went that way, with Hidan" raising his eyebrow, he takes no time to question out loud, leaving to go find her quickly. This was starting to put even more knots into her stomach, gulping she runs away into the base, she didn't know why but she wanted to be anywhere but there right now. Like an animal with a signal she shudder's, something bad had just happened. Konan came in looking paler than a ghost, eyes wide and her head down in fear, she looked like death warmed over. Gulping Lokier get's up and runs to her hideout, getting into it and shutting over the slab, going to a corner and curling up. She normally wasn't someone who got scared, but the adrenaline of fear was cascading, up and down her blood stream and into her brain.  
Lately she had added more to the room, including chair's, a table, pictures, carpet's and even extended rooms. Walking her very own little base-house, Lokier could hear muffled yelling, it would have been louder. The woman had placed sound-muffle coats in the walls along with the extension, to keep her base from caving in or being discovered. Under here she had her very own bedroom, kitchen and bathroom too. She never had to worry about being walked in on again, not that she ever did anyway. Having a hot bath she soaks into it, shutting her eyes and sighing, this was what she did on a daily bases. Not only did it make her smell nice, but it kept her from stressing her self, too a point that her hair falls out.


	4. Chapter 4

Coming out in a nightwear kimono under her cloak, Lokier spins her piercing's back in, sitting down to eat the dinner she missed. It was cold but she didn't mind, she thought the carrots tasted sweeter that way. When they marinated in their juice for a little while longer than necessary, and that was when it happened, half way through her first few spoonfuls. She had noticed that no one else's food had been touched, tilting her head she stands up. Pein and Konan's wine hadn't been lifted either, snickering she takes a gulp from both glasses. Almost choking to death on how horrible it was, no wonder they only drank at dinner time. It washed down the terrible cooking, with even worse, bitter-juice. After living with several, anger-management, men. Lokier had gained a sixth sense for danger. Maybe it's a fight between Tobi and Deidara. Maybe a code warning, that Kakuzu's money had gone missing. Or maybe someone who has spent several hours, trying to contemplate - and needs to vent their frustration. Everyone else had seen his face, and had run for it. Lokier had her back to him, still splashing out about the taste in her mouth.

"Did you do your pre-training?" he questions, making her jump with shock and spin around. Hiding the glass behind her back, trying to pretend she hadn't touched it.  
"Yes?" she had cringed back, he was towering over her with that expression. Death and bitter-intent to kill her, he wanted too and would the minute he found something she hadn't done right, he would.  
"Read the scrolls I gave you?" he enquires off the bullet, Lokier nodding hesitantly.  
"Yes" she squeaks, straightening her posture up. Too try seem a little taller; not that she could reach any further, than to his chin.  
"Did you feed the cat?" he enquires, the female starting to gain her confidence again.  
"Yes." she states, she was winning, and it was clear Pein was running low on things to use.  
"Supply notes for Kakuzu?" she had done that weeks ago, and had given them too imr, of course she had.  
"Yes!" she snaps, hands placed on her hips, his nose flaring. Perhaps provoking him wasn't a 'special', idea.  
"Repaint the walls in the game's room?" now he was taking any idea's popping into his head; truthfully she had grown bored during the night, and had spent it cleaning or fixing the base.  
"Yes…" there was never anything better to-do, so re-decorating was a pass time - a boring one but it was better than sitting around, watching TV and eating fatty foods.  
"Okay. But... did you go ahead and fix your microphone-scroll, so it doesn't play that annoying song. Every single time, you get a message?" gulping she glances away, looking back up into his eerie grey eyes and nodding, slowly.  
"Uh... Yes." about to leave her scroll beeper goes off, the only thing going through her mind after that millisecond was, [Crap].

The evil grin on the leader's face growing, he had found someone to attack. Lokier dodging his icy talons and running out the door, squealing down the hallway, around a corner and into something. Thudding to the floor she struggles to her knee's, being pulled along the floor a few seconds after that by the ankle. Whining to him deliberately pulling her over bumps. "Leader~" she pines, doing a press-up too prod his hand. "This isn't fair, I didn't do anything wrong" she pouts, spinning on the floor as he rolls her into his office. Apparently he had gotten Konan and Hidan too, they had been gagged as Lokier watches him lock the door. The albino had it easy, he liked pain, in-fact he was rather pleased by the purple lip he had. 'I hate you', being lipped to her by Konan - apparently they thought it was her fault for him, the agitated and over-possessive Leader, kidnapping them. "Don't look at me, I don't know what's going on" the crimson haired woman pout's, her piercing shimmering under a candle's light.  
"You told him we were dating!" she snaps, the leader only listening to the conversation, there is a confused expression. And then a horrified shuffle backwards, Lokier looking at Konan like she was a monster - apparently they were trying to escape by pinning the blame, on Pein's most trusted member. Lokier would tell him anything, and he was probably angry that she 'knew' about the relationship.  
"You did what? But I thought you were dating Jhin-Jhie…" twitching her eyebrow, her head turns down in thought, "What would the babies look like…" her head tilting up, and a look of disgusting appearing on her face. "They'd be mutated Freaks! Tell the gods, you didn't have sex with him…it's a sin against nature" she plight's, stressing herself and beating her own soul, without the need of Pein. "The…the kids would be horrible pig-mutants, with slick back blue hair. They'd have huge tusks, and eyes that stick out a mile!" her eyes widening, as she squashes her nose, a little 'oink' to go with it. "I'm damn-damn-damn apposed, to it! If you and him had children, then they'd be horrible freaks with pink-skin, no over bites, and beady little eyes - that are too close to their noses!" she had began repeating herself, trying to get the point across, screaming when she imagines what Pein would look like.

Laying down she curls up and sucks her thumb, whimpering while Konan stares. Twitching her eyebrow to the over-reaction, Lokier shutting her eyes and paying attention to the floor instead. It had grown completely quiet, every so often the red head would whisper something like, 'And they'd have flat hair with no style', 'They'd be unable to cast Jutsu and everyone would bow down to some person off the TV'.  
"If this is a bad Rom-Com, please kill the director…this is just another conversation about an attraction, I'll never understand." the leader had just been watching, he found it funny watching Lokier breaking down into a fit. More of a grin to the fact that he was right, in knowing that she would never lie to him. Watching him leave the room, she pushes herself up, untying the pair and breaking for the door, making sure he wasn't around before running out. Hiding under a table, she could hear him storming around, cursing the fact that he had stupidly left them in the room. Even more pathetically, that he had left the sly, and devious one, untied.

Giving it a few hours the redhead comes out from hiding, going towards his office to peer around. "Jhin-Jhie? ...Jhin-Jhie…" she calls coming into the empty room, going towards his desk, and looking at a piece of paper. "Hm. What he's wrote will be a window into his madness…" she could feel the tension building up, as she approaches the chair, sitting down and wheeling it in to look at the paper. "Feelin' fine…well. That's a relief" she sigh's leaning further into the leather chair, she felt rather important sitting on it. Jumping when the candles go out, finding more fear in there being highlighted words, all over the walls. Pein must have found her illuminative spray paint, she used to use it too scare people in the dark - when she got bored. 'No company and no trust, makes Pein go crazy', gulping she leans further into the soft, warm arm chair. "This is less encouraging…" she mumbles, going to get up, hearing something move she stills. "Jhin-Jhie?" she enquires in a husked voice, getting up and going towards where she thinks the door is.

Tripping over something onto the ground, grunting the crimson haired woman sit's onto her hip. Crawling back she leans against the table, hauling herself up to lean on the desk, looking awkwardly at the leader staring at her. Giving a nervous 'heh?', Lokier could feel him behind her, tensing she turns around but doesn't look up.  
"You knew, about Konan didn't you?" he enquires, great and she had just gotten over that horrific train of thought.  
"No…I thought she was bumping you at night" she states in a nonchalant manner, slitting her eyes but staring at his chest. "Besides…I'd hate too think, what Your babies would be like. I mean they'd be born with piercing's…and pale grey skin…and an afro of bright orange hair. They'd be the equivalent of rotting vegetables, that have been hit by a gang of rowdy nails" she plight's finally looking up at him, pouting at him as he stares at her, not in his usual icy manner either.

"Well, they would! I mean…you and Hidan just wouldn't work out" that seemed to bring him too his sense's, grinning at him he glares. "He's nut's, and you're just a fruitcake" she smiles pleasantly, if nothing brought the leader around, then her jokes would. "Gosh, what would mine look like? If I wanted any…I doubt it really. T-they'd be redheaded, pale kids, with funny eyes and a great fashion-sense. It would shock the nation, a ginger Goth!" she sniggers at this, she knew the leader never smiles let alone laughed. But Lokier could feel the tension releasing, so it must have been working, somehow. "…If I had kids with Kisame, then they'd be blue skinned, red headed. Weird eyed, warty, snake breathed…Things! A-and do you know what job they'd get? They'd become, our worst nightmares, we're talking dimples. He could become... the Kage" that made the leader shudder. "An orthodontist….or worse. A lawyer!" grabbing her mouth she blinks, she hadn't been paying attention to his existence up until now.  
"Enough…before you give me a heart attack" he grumbles, his eyebrow scrunched with annoyance, staring into his grey eyes she shuts her own. Feeling his hand moving away she reopens her eyes, snickering slightly to herself.  
~Joy to the world, Lokier's dead! We've - barbequed - her head!~ he seems to just emotionlessly stare at her, cuddling him she places her chin to his chest, staring up vertically from below him. ~What happened to her body? We flushed it down the potty! And round and round it goes, and round and round it goes~ she chants with a smile, it was difficult getting him to cheer up, glancing away she tries to think of something.

"Let me ask you something. You're kind of a boob guy, right?" she enquires, Pein's cheeks pressing up as he half stares, half questions his hearing, and her question.  
"Excuse me?" the ginger enquires, Lokier waving both her hands nervously.  
"I can tell, because I've seen you look at mine. Um, not in a sleazy way, or anything…" she laughs, Pein taking a deep breath and releasing it.  
"I think this is the most uncomfortable conversation, I've ever had" he states certainly, the redhead cross her arms and humming softly.  
"You wanna touch one?" she enquires, with large doe eyes but a sneaky smile on her lips, Pein widening his eyes.  
"I stand corrected." at least it was funny, for her anyway, the leader was a shy person - even if he would never admit it.  
"Ah, so your instinct is to pass on this, fantastic, one-time offer?" she enquires with a smile, shaking her fisted hand, her thumb and index finger in the shape on an 'L'. Rolling her eyes she waves at him, concocting something in her head. "Okay, so my point is. If someone tried to pull the plug on you, without being totally honest with you. You know where they'd end up?" she had started confusing him, it was a good way too help him keep his mind off troubling matters. "In Hell, watching 'The View'! R-iii-ight, next to the super high, unreachable, cupcake table over there!" her hand pointing to the desk, when she was younger and came to see him, that table was gigantic.

She could never reach the desk, he'd only figure out she was there the moment something fell. Or almost less than a millimetre of little podgy finger's, pocked up from the top of the desk. Lokier did like Pein as well, as a child, if Orochimaru was ignoring her she would come sit on his lap; pull his piercing's playfully, draw on his important notebooks, or just go there to sleep. Because of the lightening outside, it was quiet in his room, it always had been which made it more peaceful than any other place. She'd never admit it, but she did miss sitting on his lap, curled up into his cloak while he loomed over her, working.  
It was one of those things that that felt like home, that one place you felt safe and secure, where no one could say, or do, anything to you. It was nice that at least as a child, the leader would sit and quietly -enjoy- her old ritual lamb slaughter, of 'baa-baa, black sheep'. The other's could never stand being around her for more than a minute, for a guy Pein had the maternal instincts. Sometimes if she went missing as a child, he'd come looking for her. Though she wasn't sure if that was because someone had complained, or maybe that he missed her company.

[FB - reminiscing (first person)]

I had been playing with the dough in my room, paint all over my face as I giggle. A putty of ovals and circles compiled together in a stack, everyone had either gone for drinks or were away somewhere. Standing up I go to the door, barely brushing the handle to open it. Outside it was cold but no more icy than it usually was, you could probably hear my little feet going along the corridor, in an inelegant fashion. I had been given hand-me downs from the leader, they were still too big for me but I didn't mind. It was nice to get a present once in a while from him, I barely got to see anyone other than myself.  
Poster's in my room sometimes kept me company, or people from the magic box in the living room. I had always been curious to how they got in there, wandering aimlessly I trip over again. It was empty in the base, not even the sound of speaking could be heard either. Glancing around I spot something shimmering in a room, turning on the light to find it to be the kitchen.

Wandering in I go to the counter and look up, climbing up the stool onto the table, standing up completely to try open the cupboard. I had seen the puddle on the desk but just ignored it, pulling at the door it opens then slams shut again. Pouting I pull it a little harder, slipping slightly but managing to get into the food-stash, there was so much chocolate on the shelves. My little voice humming the 'X-men' tune, I thought we were the real X-men team - under cover and hidden in enemy territory. Rustling through a bag, my eyes widen with awe, there was chocolate bars in the shape of bunnies in here.  
Hearing someone I turn to see the leader glaring from the door way, his arm's crossed as I turn to wave. I had forgotten about the counter and step off, seeing the ground getting closer my eyes shut quickly. Opening them slowly to look at Pein, his arms holding me like a small bride. Smiling up at him he glares back down, my mouth shutting and my eyes shifting to stare at the red cloud.

Being put down he disappears into the darkness, feeling alone again I sit back in my room. Eating the treats to try comfort the strange feeling in my stomach, he never had time to play with me, no one did. It was no wonder I couldn't talk yet, no one had the time to teach me. Traipsing the hallways again, I look at the big door, I always tried to go outside, I only wanted to play. Pein would just tell me I wasn't allowed out until I was older, he said that every year though, how much older did I have to get? Glaring I pack my little traveller's bag and go outside, through the cave and into the forest. Bugs flying about and birds in the branches, Zetsu said they were called butterflies and blackbirds. Humming the X-men tune again I hadn't noticed someone following me, finding a log with green fluff on it I kneel. Sticking my cheek into it out of amusement, it felt just like a pillow, the small green bit's tickling my nose causing me to sneeze.

Hearing a branch snap I peer up, nothing was there as I look up at the big blue thing, I think it was called the 'sky'. I wonder how they pulled the clouds down, to give them to our cloaks, I liked the summer but rain was my favourite. The leader had told me that there is a giant water-bath in the sky, dripping the water down when little birds would fly up for a wash, that was why it rained. Pein was really smart! He knew everything, that was probably why I liked talking to him the most. Deciding to go back towards the base, I spot the plant, if he saw me I'd be in big trouble.  
Sneaking through the bushes I run towards the door, apparently he hadn't seen me as I quickly shut it. Going to my room, and pulling out the stones I had found, and a few sticks too. Hiding them when the door opens, glancing innocently at Pein who seemed angry about something. Shutting the door again my hopeful smile fades, he wasn't going to play with me yet, he promised he would take me to an old oak tree.

Glancing down I hold the rock in my hand, it looked a little like one of his metal-bobbles. I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes, why wouldn't anyone pay attention to me? Even a crumb of acknowledgment, or a 'hello' would make my day, maybe even my entire month if it was even just a cuddle. Getting up I find myself standing in front of his door, my small hand reaches to open it but then I stop. If I disturbed him now then he wasn't going to take me to the tree, hesitantly I stare at the shining handle but walk away. I just had to be patient and wait, sitting in my room I had begun to fall asleep. My hand gripping the rucksack as I lay on it, curled up and staring at the door, I could feel the tears coming back. He wasn't really going to take me to the oak tree, was he? Falling asleep someone enters the room, looking up hopefully I dull back down. It was just Sasori, he glares at me as I look up at him.

"The leader wants me to take you to a stupid tree" he states in a bored manner, I just become gloomy, sitting back down to curl up against my bag. Shaking my head and looking down at the floor, it was supposed to be a trip for us to go on. He had promised to take me once every month, but he never has because he's always too busy. "Suit's yourself" the puppet-master mutter's, shutting the door. Sighing I look at the bed and go to it, falling asleep drowning in my own tears. In the morning I didn't feel like I even wanted to get up, it felt like the energy was drained from me for some reason. It hurt more that he didn't even notice, he just looked at me then went back to talking to Orochimaru and Sasori.  
As if I didn't even exist, but I probably didn't to them. Disappearing back out the door I trip over on my way to my room, going straight to my big red bear. A smile stitched on it's face, I had turned it to face the wall, so I was against the corner on it's lap. If I did that, and closed my eyes; it felt just like I was with Pein, squished between him and the desk. Cuddling into it I just sigh, it didn't feel warm or protective, not like Pein's lap where his desk was. I could hug my toy but it wasn't going to hug me back, Pein wouldn't hug me either, that was probably why I had drawn grey marks on the bears nose.

It looked like and acted just like the leader, I know that he needs space to work but he could let me draw on the floor by the desk. Sneaking out into the garden I dump my weight onto the grass, I didn't care if the guard-plant caught me. Seeing him coming over I just pluck the grass, for some reason he just sit's down next to me, watching me plucking each one out of the ground.  
"You're not allowed out of the base…" he states, at least it was his nicer side that said it, I wasn't afraid of the other half but he always said nasty things. Shrugging my glare just melts to a saddened glance at the grass.  
"**T****he leader didn't take you to the tree again, huh**?" his evil side enquires, I just nod, there was no point denying it.  
"We'll play with you, **if you want**" he states, since when did the guard-plant want to take time to play with me? His usual games where ones that involved taking me to the leader, to tell him I hadn't stayed in the base like he always told me to do. Looking at him questioningly I stare, what would we play? "We can…plant some sunflowers" blinking I stand up and follow him, I had ended up almost buried to my shoulder's in soil; just getting one seed planted. It was fun though, and Zetsu even taught me about different plants. Being with the plant for a few weeks, I had completely forgot about the leader. I knew it probably hurt when I ran right past him to Zetsu, like I hadn't even seen him. My face bright and happy to see the plant, the leader watching me tugging Zetsu away to the gardens, I wanted to see how my sunflower was doing.

Shovelling my dinner down, I drop from the chair and run out the door, back out into the garden to sit by the pot. Staring at the soil eagerly waiting for something to pop out, glancing at Orochimaru and Itachi walking around together. For some reason he kept trying to grab his ponytail, turning back I stare at the pot again, I really wanted my plant to grow. I never had the patience to wait, Zetsu told me that this might help me find some. Glancing at a pair of feet I look up at the leader, blinking at him then going back to staring at the plant. Gasping to find there was a stem, poking out from the soil - and I had missed it by looking away. Pouting I shuffle closer to loom over it, blinking to find the leader pick me up, struggling I thump his chest gently.  
I wanted to watch the plant a little longer, I didn't mind if it was getting dark, the sound of thunder on the other hand makes me change my mind. Pein flinching when I grab his cloak zip, pulling it down just enough for me to hide inside. Zipping it back up people would have thought the leader might have become a woman, shuddering into his chest I could feel one of his hands cup my ear, through the cloth. My finger's intertwined with his vest netting, my eyes shut tight as the thunder seems to disappear.

Hearing the zip shift I could feel his icy hand stroke my cheek, leaning into it sheepishly. I hadn't sat on his lap for some time, it felt good to see him, the fact that he took any interest was nice. Looking up at him in a tiered manner, my hand reaches up, his grey rings watching me pull one of his chin piercing's. I had always wanted one, they looked cool - I wouldn't mind if it were only my ear lobes that got pierced, as long as I had one.  
"Eleroo~" I murmur, gripping his shirt, Pein pauses and looks down on me.  
"Did you just speak?" he enquires with awe, opening my eyes I glance back up, curiously.  
"Eleroo?" the words frightening me a little, where were they coming from? "Eler…oo" was I the one saying that, or was it Pein? Maybe my favourite show was on the T.V, I loved 'The Wuzzles'. I'd never hesitate to make the leader watch it with me, the elephant reminded me of him. Grey with a tuft of orange hair, just like Pein.  
"Can you say Pein?" he questions, putting me on the desk to hold my hands gently. Opening my mouth I just smile, wrapping my arms around his neck playfully.  
"Eleroo!" I could feel his eyebrow twitching, he must have caught on that it wasn't Eleroo that I liked, but him; and wouldn't hesitate to bring pictures of the elephant to him, because it reminded me of the leader.  
"Say, Pein. Pe-in" he states, trying to encourage me to say his real name. Pouting I try again.  
"Pe…Pein!" I stutter, the plain expression on his face turning to a dog-eared grin, the kind that would have crushed a village by this point. I wanted that reaction, I wanted him to smile. To praise me for doing something good. "Pein…l-oo-ve?" I question, tripping over my words. The grey skinned leader pauses, rubbing my head affectionately, and pulling me back onto his lap.  
"Her firsts words…and I was the first to hear them" he smirks, cuddling me like a teddy. At that point I felt so warm inside, this was the first time since I can remember that he seemed to care. Let alone show some kind of emotion, he always kept a straight and stern face. Yawning softly it was clear that all the excitement had made me tiered, nuzzled into him I begin to fall asleep. The candle light flickering, and the scratching sound of Pein writing in the background, I felt at home.

[End FB]

Wrapping her arms around him, she nuzzles his chest, she knew he hated being cuddled. If it were because she hugged him or not, she wouldn't be sure of either. /  
"Love you~" she mumbles, letting him go and smiling, at least he was calm again. By the expression his face, he probably didn't believe her. "You're a good leader, you shouldn't let little things constrict you" she states leaving the room, "Cya Eleroo", she hadn't said that in some time, Pein blinking slightly.


	5. Chapter 5

Standing in the training ground Lokier stares into space, sitting down to just day-dream at the crack in the floor. She had started to question, if she really wanted to try run away. She wanted to learn about her creation, but at the same time she didn't want to know. The red-head was unsure if running away was the answer, what if something terrible happened? What if Pein took another flip, and killed someone. That would be on her conscience, for the rest of her life. So much for being a ninja, she loved to learn new things, but she didn't want to use them on anyone.  
The guards back at the forest would have woken up by now, she had only knocked them out. Hidan was immortal, and they had demons, she didn't mind going all out on him. What would the leader think, if she refused to hurt someone? What if something horrible happened, and she didn't have the heart to hurt them? Lokier wanted to be average, she wanted to go out and meet people.

Go to the night clubs, go to concert's, maybe cuddle up to someone special each night. Lokier would gladly trade all of her strength to someone who wished they had it, but couldn't get it. She did feel sad, knowing that her unnaturally powerful chakra and abilities, where a curse to her. It wouldn't be long before someone was looking for her to use her power, to wield it and to spill unnecessary blood. Flopping back she stares up, up towards the ceiling and yet she does not make eye contact with it. There was a feeling welling up in her stomach, rolling and spinning like a tumble-dryer on full throttle. What was this feeling, her ears picking up the constant step of someone's feet. Rolling onto her stomach she glances around, her voice echoing through the emptiness. "Hello? Hello…" she whisper's, rolling over again to laze on her back. "The rain clouds have come to play again" she sigh's starting to concentrate on the rain, shutting her eyes to relax.  
~Soon I know, I will never awake from this dream. Please, don't try to fix me, I'm not broken. I'm the lie, living for you so you can hide. Please, don't cry~ she utters opening her eyes again, rubbing the foundation from her eyes. She had been hiding the greying rings, she was forcing herself not to sleep. Lokier didn't want the nightmares to come back, they stayed in the darkness of her mind, but she knew they were there, waiting.

"Are you always this depression, un?" Deidara sarcastically questions, coming through the door with Sasori to eye her up and down on the floor.  
"Would you rather I sat, singing a song about you. Butter-Bear?" she smiles, the blonde gives a confused stare. She had these weird nicknames for them, they were characters from 'The Wuzzles'. Lokier had decided to name them this way for a little while, too see if she could bring some warmth from the past back.  
"What would you possibly sing?" he glares, the baby blue eyes and the usual pout putting a smile on her face. Even if he was about her age, he was just as adorable as that butt-head Tobi sometimes.  
"Mm…I don't know…" she mumbles, turning to look at the rafters again. Still on the floor, something clicking in her mind.  
~Did you ever know that you're my hero, and everything I would like to be. I can fly higher than an eagle, cause you are the wind beneath my wings~ she sings softly, glancing at him and grinning. The tint of pink in his cheeks was priceless, her metallic eyes glinting at Sasori. He glares back, a warning for her to not even try, singing a song about him.  
"Can you move now? We need to train…" he mumbles, Lokier getting up and disappearing into the hallway. Perched on the sofa and flicking channels, she still wasn't sure if she wanted to run away. Another worrying thing was the fact that Pein had become the new reason, holding her back. Sitting eating her dinner that next night she almost chokes, eyes bulged at something. Cheeks burning hotter than the sun, sliding her chair out she pushes it back in and runs from the room. Out the front of the base and into the forest, still choking slightly. It had finally dawned on her, like a boulder on a mouse, she was crushed. Pein was her Achilles-heel, she was…in love with him.

Twisting she smacks her head against a tree, clawing the bark with shock, this couldn't be happening. She couldn't be in love with the leader! They were like family, they were too close for that kind of thing. It wasn't like the ginger leader would be able to return such affections, not with his heart still panging for Konan. He'd think she was trying to move in for the kill, take him while he's at his weakest to get something out of it. Lokier was officially dumbfounded, as she slides down onto the grass to curl up and hum loudly. 'La-la-la' being boomed to try block out the thoughts, was that what was making her scream with terror? She was having dreams of her and Pein, getting too close and personal in his office? That couldn't be it, she couldn't be falling for that stuck up leader! Grabbing her face she starts to squirm her body, beginning to do an impression of the 'scream'. Flopping to the grass, with her bum in the air on her knee's, her finger's in hair and her face in the mud.  
"…I didn't expect to see this" someone murmur's, her face pulling out of the mud, onto her chin. Staring at Konan you could almost see Lokier's soul, coming out of her gaped mouth. "Fallen in love with another member huh? Who did you kiss this time" she laugh's, the redhead jolting up and stomping, her eyes a white circle void as fire steams from her mouth.  
"I just forgot to clean the cellar! I came out here for fresh air!" she snaps in defence, stomping past as Konan smirks evilly.  
"You know…Pein and you. I'd watch your back…" stilling Lokier turns around, trying to fight the fear in her soul. Would Konan really tell the leader, how did she even know in the first place?  
"I don't know what your talking about" the red head states, trying to defend herself, the paper nin only laughs and pats her shoulder as she walks past this time.

"I've seen the way you look at him, funny that you never realised up until now…" her voice drifting arrogantly through the air, Lokier gulping and watching the other woman walk away. Great, now not only did she have to worry about running away. But she had to worry about Pein finding out, Konan black mailing her along with Hidan, and for her actual love for him. She knew it would only be heartache, that's how it ended with Deidara and Kisame too, and every other guys she ever had a chance with. Slipping down the tree, Lokier sigh's into the chilly rain. It was at least an hour before she came back in, people where gocking and whispering. They knew, it was obvious from the way they looked at her. Pein was staring, she couldn't bare to look at him, not now.

Slipping through the darkened hallway, the water dripping like a puddle of tears onto the floor. They were a symbol of how she felt, the sadness straying like a ,'look-at-me', sign. Into the room that was completely empty, and into her little base down below. Curling up on the bed, she didn't care if it was soaking the mattress. Maybe running away was a good idea, it was better than hearing everyone's thoughts. That morning she woke up, Lokier had only just managed to pull herself from the bed to get dry that night. Sitting eating quietly, her calves coiled around the legs of the chair. She could hear someone coming, lowering further into the chair as they ghost past. Pein sitting down quietly, leaning on his elbows and into his knitted finger's. Lokier could feel his cold, dead, eyes slicing into her from where he sat. Soon enough everyone was doing it, any more and she could break down into tears. And that was what happened, behind her hair she tilts her head, biting her lip and whimpering.

"You know, just because someone dumps you - doesn't mean it's the end of the world" the blue haired nin states, sipping her coffee. The air around Lokier becoming like thick black tar, through her red hair was blackness. Only the glowing of her silver eye, through a slit of hair, can be seen.  
"**E**_**xcuse…me?**_" Lokier enquires with a demonic hiss, Tobi almost falling from the chair right beside her, that was the scariest thing he had ever seen. Hidan's hair was on end, Pein and Konan's eyes bulging.  
"Well, you know. A guys a guy, you don't need to be such a cry baby about it" she coolly states, Konan trying to regain her composure but it is lost again by another hacked growl.  
"_**T**__**hank you, I'll keep that in mind…the next time I'm **__**ripping**__** them apart. For lying**_" she suddenly sigh's, bouncing into the most bubbly expression the world had ever seen, reaching for the salt and sprinkling it. "Do I still have to fix the roof? Only it's raining and it'll be slippery" the leader had started to twitch his eyebrow, Tobi frightened for his life. What kind of mood swing would she have next?!

So apparently Pein hadn't been told, but that scary moment at breakfast was not the end of Konan's games. Lokier couldn't even trust the blue haired woman, when she started whispering something. Hidan was grinning, it was obvious he knew about it now. That was a bad move on Konan's part, Hidan had a plan up his sleeve and with a mutter to the leader it was in action. Hidan stating that as blackmail, she had to stand still and not fight back. It was payment for blowing him to pieces the first time, and then 'telling' Pein of his fling with Konan.  
Staring at the albino snickering and snidely commenting her, Lokier daydreams off into space. Everyone watching because they wanted too see the redhead beat the crap out of him, again. At first she jumps and side steps his hits, deliberately hopping the other way and having the scythe hit her back. Gritting her teeth as she hops backwards, the albino cackling as he creates a new circle on the floor. The red head grunt's, the gash healing over, as she prepares for the worst. The other's had started to complain that she wasn't doing it right, they probably wanted to see her use the mallet again. As usual he licks his weapons, thumping them against his palm as he stabs his leg. Lokier growls, running at him with a kunai, limping on the painful leg. Hidan stabbing his crotch, the redhead screeching and dropping down, arms wrapped around her hip.

"You're a pathetic bitch, aren't you?" he enquires, sadistically smiling and grinning, his eyes wide and happy. Lokier grunts, standing up to stare at him in a daze. Blood running from her short's, her nose flaring as she suddenly runs at him again. Ignoring the fact that it made the wound worse, the albino using the back of his scythe to throw her back across the battle dome. Spinning and skidding Lokier slides on her toes and fingertips, body curved and against the ground like a shifting wolf. Taking a glance to the leader she turns away again, looking at the ground secretly. The albino was probably going to kill her, the great big plan in the end right? Thinking of Pein and her pulling his piercing's, the old oak tree they used to sit next appear's in her head. "Give up and go die somewhere, stupid slut!" how much did she really love the leader? Lokier knew she loved him a lot, too much to have her last fight be this pathetic.

Straightening her body, her shoulder's knock back, eyes turning to the ceiling. The female suddenly smiling physchotically into the pain, her mouth wide as a laugh circles the air. What was she going to just stand there, and take it? Hidan and Konan hurt the leader, if anyone - they deserved the worst. Gripping the kunai in her hand she looks at it, smiling happily, that smile slowly detracting to a flat state. Putting it in her belt, she places her finger's together, like a single blade, her sharp polished nails glinting in the artificial light.  
[For Pein, for my first - and my last] Hidan blinking to the unarmed woman, running towards him with a cynical set of eyes. Was she really going to try running at him? Holding out the blade Hidan grins cockily, glancing to Konan who is cheering. Everyone else anticipating Lokier to stop, Lokier just speeds up towards the blade. The sharpened spine level with her heart, with her teeth bore and agape. A line of drool weaves inside of her mouth, to influence her madness. The albino turning with wide eyes, everyone else yelling something that can't be heard. Something along the lines of, 'Lokier, what are you doing?!', 'Lokier stop!'. Pein and Itachi had moved the fastest to try stop it, but they were too slow.

A thin line of blood splashes across the floor, her straight edged finger's inside the albino's wind-pipe. Her thumb underneith, dug straight into Hidan's Adams-apple; and holding tightly to his voice-box. The icy cold pole through her chest, warming up in her crimson blood. Lokier's eyes stay wide open, anger was the only thing fuelling her movements now; she had done this to prove she wasn't scared of Hidan - or Konan. Pein was not to be mocked, his emotions weren't little bells - that could be rung at any time. Blood rolls out and down from her lip, she could feel the pole deep inside of her, threatening to disconnect her spine.  
Gritting her teeth her shoulder's tense and rise, her leg's shuffling to a grand pose. "Fuck, You" Lokier snaps, and with that there is a gruesome squelch. Hidan's eyes wide, Lokier's eyes shuddering. Holding his voice box in her grip she gulps. Digging her nails in and crushing it like a juice carton, opening her mouth nothing comes out. Lokier knew that if she pulled his voice box out, it may have served a purpose, but in the end she would lose her most loved possession - her ability to speak, to sing - to be heard from the cold, damp, darkness in which she didn't want to thrive in; but lived in all the same.

Slowly, her weight starts to drop. Her knee's splashing in the murky blood. Hidan dropping with her, his eyes wide with shock. Lokier shutting her own and leaning back, a pair of hands seizing her shoulders. Drawing her dying eyes to Pein's face, the sweetest thing she could ever see before she died.  
[The life upon her yellow hair, but not within her eyes - The life still there, upon her hair - the death upon her eyes.] his mouth was moving but nothing could be heard, the tears welling up and dropping down onto his hand, holding her head up. 'Pein, I love you', she wanted to scream that but she couldn't. The tears stinging her eyes, like salt to a wound. 'Pein, I love you!', never removing eye contact with him.  
Lokier raises her hand to cup his chin, using her thumb to stroke his chin. Brushing past the piercing against his lip, she wished she could have at least kissed him. Lokier didn't want to leave him alone, she didn't want to cause him so much pain. Her head burning, she wanted to tell him she was sorry, for everything. For not being there when he needed her. For lying to him all the time. For worrying him sick when she ran away. For always doing stupid things, and not saying sorry.

Hearing that weird bell, her eye contact finally moves, Samahade. Everyone had become slightly panicked to it moving, the sword crawling closer. It's sharp barbed arms, reaching out, Kisame glancing away. She finally got the proof she needed, that the sword was a stalker. Reaching out she runs her hand along the bristles, the demon-sword rattling into the touch. Lokier blinking as her chakra seeps into her body, the stuff the blasted thing had been stealing all this time. Tensing her eyelid the redhead twitching into the painful healing, her insides burning like a fire. It was strange to be able too see her own chakra, the black mist and silver light oozing it's way into her veins.  
Lokier presses her temple into the leader's chest, for once she felt colder than him. He was so warm compared to her, shutting her eyes she could hear a few voices, but she concentrated only on Pein's. The deep and dark tone, whispering through her ears like the devils voice. It wasn't until a few days later that she woke up, light headed and in the dark. A small candle light flickering by a bedside table, her head slowly glancing around the empty room. This wasn't hers, but it wasn't the medical room either. The empty room consisted of a small carpet, a big black business chair and the bed she was on. It was a small single bed, the office chair rolled up against it, as if someone was meant to sit there.

On the bedside table was a small tub of medication, a coffee that was still hot right next to it, the steam rising up and spiraling. Pulling herself up Lokier looks to the door, her sight turning to the heart monitor. It was so quiet in the base, as if no one was around. Pushing the cover's away from the her leg's Lokier get's up, shakily grabbing onto the wall after only a few steps. Her crimson hair what was usually soft was matted, hearing the door open her eyes shut for a moment. Peering at who ever was entering the room, the auburn leader glares at her, pointing to the bed sternly.  
"Your not supposed to be moving about" like a lamb being told off, she goes back to the unfamiliar bed, nestling down in it's warmth. Blinking and looking at Pein's hand as it strokes her hair, her lips in an ajar pout while she trails the movement. "You've been out for a few days, you really scared us…" he states, but he meant she had scared him. A member almost dying was a common occurrence, any sympathy for her accident would probably be forced upon by the leader. Lokier wanted to apologies, but only a gasp leaves her throat, the leader watching this. Turning her head away she rubs her throat, she had forgotten the little stunt back with Hidan. Knowing him he was probably going to be yelling soon enough, the moment Kakuzu got him a new throat.

Blinking she glances down at the grey wrist, holding her hand gently. Since when was the leader even moderately affectionate? Peering at him she stares into his grey rings, cringing when the heart monitor makes her skipped heartbeat obvious. Examining the room again, she had noticed a wall with one picture on it, Pein as a child and another two. One was Konan and the other Nagato, she wished she could meet him. Apparently he was a really nice person, staring at him she had forgotten about everything else. Flinching when Pein moves, resorting herself the redhead turns around to look at him again.  
"Your not going to say something?" he enquires, it was in his eyes; he knew she couldn't speak, but he didn't want to believe it. Opening her mouth something that sounded more like the ghost's from the 'Grudge', is released.

Glancing down she crosses her legs, intertwining her finger's to stare down. Pein must have thought she was ugly, the only thing that could come from her was a gurgle now. A tear sting's her eyes, she was waiting for the leader to get up and leave. Waiting for him to comment on her appearance, how weak she was; how utterly pathetic Lokier was for letting her emotions control her. Feeling an icy hand run against her cheek she watches the hand move away, Pein examining her captured tears for a moment. "Your always crying…" Pein states, Lokier curling up into her knee's, tensing momentarily when he pulls her into his chest. Placing his chin onto her shoulder while he strokes his thumb down her back.  
The teen shuddering when one of his lukewarm - almost cold - breaths trail down her neck. "You're so weird…" he whisper's into her ear, this had drawn her back. "…Crying is supposed to be something you do for yourself, when you feel sorry for your own downfall" listening to him, Lokier stays lightly confused. "And yet I've never seen you cry for yourself, you've always cried for someone else. Like when Kisame's goldfish died, you cried because it must of hurt him" he states in a cold voice, it's warmth was there however.

"When Konan betrayed me, you fought Hidan for my honour…you cried then because you hurt someone, you care more about everyone else's feeling's. That you push your own, and your health, to the side for them" he murmur's, sounding confused himself, to how her emotions worked. "…When I told you about Nagato, you cried for me because it must have hurt…to have lost someone so close. You didn't even know him, and yet you cried for his death" Pein starts to tighten his grip on her, Lokier curled into his strong chest. "Your so…beautiful…" the heart monitor seems to have a single 'beep' heart attack, every few seconds another one would echo in the room. "…The fact that after all this time, being part of the Akatsuki. When thing's go wrong, before and after, you still take them so hard" Pein's hand running up the back of her shoulder, and squeezing it gently. Lokier had started to fall asleep into him, her hand gripping onto his cloak sheepishly. Pein had ended up sleeping beside her that night, Lokier had refused to let him go. A smile on her face, as she curls up into him. They didn't need to say it, the silence spoke louder than words.


End file.
